So you want to go for a ride in a f-14
05-30-2003, 06:51 PM
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So you want to go for a ride in a f-14
- A ride in an F-14 Very amusing. Below is an article written by Rick
Reilly for Sports Illustrated. He details his experiences when given the
opportunity to fly in an F-14 Tomcat ... very amusing.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now this message for America's most famous athletes:
Someday you may be invited to fly in the back-seat of one of your
country's most powerful fighter jets. Many of you already have -- John
Elway, John Stockton, Tiger Woods to name a few. If you get this
opportunity, let me urge you, with the greatest sincerity .
Move to Guam. Change your name. Fake your own death. Whatever you do,
do not go. I know. The U.S. Navy invited me to try it. I was thrilled. I
was pumped. I was toast! I should've known when they told me my pilot
would be Chip (Biff) King of Fighter Squadron 213 at Naval Air Station
Oceana in Beach. Whatever you're thinking a Top Gun named Chip (Biff)
King looks like, triple it.
He's about six-foot, tan, ice-blue eyes, wavy surfer hair,
finger-crippling handshake -- the kind of man who wrestles dyspeptic alligators in his leisure time. If you see this man, run the other way.
Fast. Biff King was born to fly. His father, Jack King, was for years
the voice of NASA missions. ("T-minus
15 seconds and counting...." Remember?) Chip would charge neighborhood
kids a quarter each to hear his dad. Jack would wake up from naps
surrounded by nine-year-olds waiting for him to say, "We have a
liftoff."
Biff was to fly me in an F-14D Tomcat, a ridiculously powerful $60
million weapon with as much thrust as weight. I was worried about
getting airsick, so the night before the flight I asked Biff if there
was something I should eat the next morning.
"Bananas," he said.
"For the potassium?" I asked.
"No," Biff said, "because they taste about the same coming up as they do going down."
The next morning, out on the tarmac, I had on my flight suit with my name sewn over the left breast. (No call sign -- like Crash or Sticky or Leadfoot -- but, still, very cool.) I carried my helmet in the crook of my arm, as Biff had instructed. A fighter pilot named Psycho gave me asafety briefing and then fastened me into my ejection seat, which, when employed, would "egress" me out of the plane at such a velocity that I would be immediately knocked unconscious.
Just as I was thinking about aborting the flight, the canopy closed over me, and Biff gave the ground crew a thumbs-up. In minutes we were
firing nose up at 600 mph. We leveled out and then canopy-rolled over another F-14. Those 20 minutes were the rush of my life. Unfortunately, the ride lasted 80.
It was like being on the roller coaster at Six Flags Over Hell. Only
without rails. We did barrel rolls, sap rolls, loops, yanks and banks.
We dived, rose and dived again, sometimes with a vertical velocity of 10,000 feet per minute. We chased another F-14, and it chased us. We broke the speed of sound. Sea was sky and sky was sea. Flying at 200 feet we did 90-degree turns at 550 mph, creating a G force of 6.5, which
is to say I felt as if 6.5 times my body weight was smashing against me. And I egressed the bananas. I egressed the pizza from the night before.
And the lunch before that. I egressed a box of Milk Duds from the sixthgrade. I made Linda Blair look polite. Because of the G's, I wasegressing stuff that did not even want to be egressed.
I went through not one airsick bag, but two. Biff said I passed out. Twice. I was coated in sweat. At one point, as we were coming in upside down
in a banked curve on a mock bombing target and the G's were flattening me like a tortilla and I was in and out of consciousness, I realized I was the first person in history to throw down.
I used to know cool. Cool was Elway throwing a touchdown pass, or Norman making a five-iron bite. But now I really know cool. Cool is guys
like Biff, men with cast-iron stomachs and Freon nerves. I wouldn't go up there again for Derek Jeter's black book, but I'm glad Biff does
every day, and for less money per year than a rookie reliever makes in a home stand. A week later, when the spins finally stopped, Biff called. He said he
and the fighters had the perfect call sign for me. Said he'd send it on a patch for my flight suit.
What is it? I asked.
"Two Bags."
Reilly for Sports Illustrated. He details his experiences when given the
opportunity to fly in an F-14 Tomcat ... very amusing.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now this message for America's most famous athletes:
Someday you may be invited to fly in the back-seat of one of your
country's most powerful fighter jets. Many of you already have -- John
Elway, John Stockton, Tiger Woods to name a few. If you get this
opportunity, let me urge you, with the greatest sincerity .
Move to Guam. Change your name. Fake your own death. Whatever you do,
do not go. I know. The U.S. Navy invited me to try it. I was thrilled. I
was pumped. I was toast! I should've known when they told me my pilot
would be Chip (Biff) King of Fighter Squadron 213 at Naval Air Station
Oceana in Beach. Whatever you're thinking a Top Gun named Chip (Biff)
King looks like, triple it.
He's about six-foot, tan, ice-blue eyes, wavy surfer hair,
finger-crippling handshake -- the kind of man who wrestles dyspeptic alligators in his leisure time. If you see this man, run the other way.
Fast. Biff King was born to fly. His father, Jack King, was for years
the voice of NASA missions. ("T-minus
15 seconds and counting...." Remember?) Chip would charge neighborhood
kids a quarter each to hear his dad. Jack would wake up from naps
surrounded by nine-year-olds waiting for him to say, "We have a
liftoff."
Biff was to fly me in an F-14D Tomcat, a ridiculously powerful $60
million weapon with as much thrust as weight. I was worried about
getting airsick, so the night before the flight I asked Biff if there
was something I should eat the next morning.
"Bananas," he said.
"For the potassium?" I asked.
"No," Biff said, "because they taste about the same coming up as they do going down."
The next morning, out on the tarmac, I had on my flight suit with my name sewn over the left breast. (No call sign -- like Crash or Sticky or Leadfoot -- but, still, very cool.) I carried my helmet in the crook of my arm, as Biff had instructed. A fighter pilot named Psycho gave me asafety briefing and then fastened me into my ejection seat, which, when employed, would "egress" me out of the plane at such a velocity that I would be immediately knocked unconscious.
Just as I was thinking about aborting the flight, the canopy closed over me, and Biff gave the ground crew a thumbs-up. In minutes we were
firing nose up at 600 mph. We leveled out and then canopy-rolled over another F-14. Those 20 minutes were the rush of my life. Unfortunately, the ride lasted 80.
It was like being on the roller coaster at Six Flags Over Hell. Only
without rails. We did barrel rolls, sap rolls, loops, yanks and banks.
We dived, rose and dived again, sometimes with a vertical velocity of 10,000 feet per minute. We chased another F-14, and it chased us. We broke the speed of sound. Sea was sky and sky was sea. Flying at 200 feet we did 90-degree turns at 550 mph, creating a G force of 6.5, which
is to say I felt as if 6.5 times my body weight was smashing against me. And I egressed the bananas. I egressed the pizza from the night before.
And the lunch before that. I egressed a box of Milk Duds from the sixthgrade. I made Linda Blair look polite. Because of the G's, I wasegressing stuff that did not even want to be egressed.
I went through not one airsick bag, but two. Biff said I passed out. Twice. I was coated in sweat. At one point, as we were coming in upside down
in a banked curve on a mock bombing target and the G's were flattening me like a tortilla and I was in and out of consciousness, I realized I was the first person in history to throw down.
I used to know cool. Cool was Elway throwing a touchdown pass, or Norman making a five-iron bite. But now I really know cool. Cool is guys
like Biff, men with cast-iron stomachs and Freon nerves. I wouldn't go up there again for Derek Jeter's black book, but I'm glad Biff does
every day, and for less money per year than a rookie reliever makes in a home stand. A week later, when the spins finally stopped, Biff called. He said he
and the fighters had the perfect call sign for me. Said he'd send it on a patch for my flight suit.
What is it? I asked.
"Two Bags."
05-30-2003, 09:52 PM
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So you want to go for a ride in a f-14
I'm sorry but that was the funniest story I heard in a long time the guys at working reading over my shoulder were almost pissing their pants.
But let me tell you that we did feel your pain for you.
I remember going to Toronto at the amusement park and their was this ride their that me and my wife and daughters looked at and thought this can't be that bad lets give it a try. Well wholly cow it's nothing like what you experienced but let me tell you I had a hard time keeping those natchos down. At the bottom of one of the runs they have a camera and you should have seen the look on our faces. priceless
By the way I am still jealous.
Enjoy!
But let me tell you that we did feel your pain for you.
I remember going to Toronto at the amusement park and their was this ride their that me and my wife and daughters looked at and thought this can't be that bad lets give it a try. Well wholly cow it's nothing like what you experienced but let me tell you I had a hard time keeping those natchos down. At the bottom of one of the runs they have a camera and you should have seen the look on our faces. priceless
By the way I am still jealous.
Enjoy!
05-31-2003, 01:33 AM
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Plane rides
I had read this story a few years ago. As a retired naval aviator I took several people/VIPS/movie stars for rides in a Grumman A-6 and EA-6B in those planes we sat side by side so they got to see out the front. I always considered it an honor to be selected to fly these people and I offered several levels of rides. Some just wanted to fly around while others got the E-ticket if they requested. Nothing and I mean NOTHING is as much fun as going out fly a low level at up to 500knots down at 200 feet above the ground do some bombing on the target range then go back and land on a aircraft carrier (in the daytime).
Sparky
Sparky
05-31-2003, 02:52 AM
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So you want to go for a ride in a f-14
elmshoot,
That must have been fantastic. I imagined that you got the tough guy saying give it your all until the end of the run when he is bent over sucking his thumb praying to king porceline or the great white throne.
whodaman,
Yes I am blessed to be able to do these things I just wished my daughters would get boyfriends so that they would torchure them instead of me on these crazy rides. Get this they took my father who is 80 years old to burger king which has a play ground inside with tubes and stuff and they coaxed my dad to go inside until he was stuck. Luckly my dad has a great sense of humour and I do have to say that I was bent over laughing at him. Hey maybe that's were my girls get it
That must have been fantastic. I imagined that you got the tough guy saying give it your all until the end of the run when he is bent over sucking his thumb praying to king porceline or the great white throne.
whodaman,
Yes I am blessed to be able to do these things I just wished my daughters would get boyfriends so that they would torchure them instead of me on these crazy rides. Get this they took my father who is 80 years old to burger king which has a play ground inside with tubes and stuff and they coaxed my dad to go inside until he was stuck. Luckly my dad has a great sense of humour and I do have to say that I was bent over laughing at him. Hey maybe that's were my girls get it
05-31-2003, 03:48 PM
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California
Hi Dave,
California was FANTASTIC, we had a little jet meet with all the guys man and we had a super super fun and funny time. We flew our thumbs off, I wish you were there I really wanted to see you. Tam now is finally learning to land his Jets
and Gordon finally saw his Bobcat fly slow 
I also thought the guys out there that Hot Glue does miracles and you never leave home without it LOL
Seeya in Fresno Dave no excuses.......... Johnny Hernandez
California was FANTASTIC, we had a little jet meet with all the guys man and we had a super super fun and funny time. We flew our thumbs off, I wish you were there I really wanted to see you. Tam now is finally learning to land his Jets
and Gordon finally saw his Bobcat fly slow I also thought the guys out there that Hot Glue does miracles and you never leave home without it LOL Seeya in Fresno Dave no excuses.......... Johnny Hernandez
05-31-2003, 10:06 PM
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F-14
Hi Sparkplug
I wish my daughter would learn to fly. If it does not have four legs and weigh 12 to 1400 hundred pounds she does not want anything to do with it. I took her flying one summer night to look at SF and looked over and she was out like a light. So I just came back and landed
Hi Johnny:
I guess I just missed that one. Ok I will see you at Fresno. Tell the guy's out there they have no idea what great flying we west coast guy's have
See Ya, Dave R
I wish my daughter would learn to fly. If it does not have four legs and weigh 12 to 1400 hundred pounds she does not want anything to do with it. I took her flying one summer night to look at SF and looked over and she was out like a light. So I just came back and landed
Hi Johnny:
I guess I just missed that one. Ok I will see you at Fresno. Tell the guy's out there they have no idea what great flying we west coast guy's have
See Ya, Dave R
06-01-2003, 02:06 AM
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So you want to go for a ride in a f-14
whodaman,
Having her beside you in flight over the bay at night must have been a great place to be.
The jury is actually still out with one of my daughters on flying since the last time we talked she had 2 carreers in mind an Astronaute or a hair dresser :stupid: My wife and I are still trying to figure out the relationship between those 2 carreers. She did say that she might not want to be an astronaute since she heard they throw up but we let her know that those are the weaker men throwing up
Having her beside you in flight over the bay at night must have been a great place to be.
The jury is actually still out with one of my daughters on flying since the last time we talked she had 2 carreers in mind an Astronaute or a hair dresser :stupid: My wife and I are still trying to figure out the relationship between those 2 carreers. She did say that she might not want to be an astronaute since she heard they throw up but we let her know that those are the weaker men throwing up
06-01-2003, 05:53 AM
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Great!
That 's the best thing I ever read on RCU!
(I once got a "mild" ride with a doctor who owned a Polish fighter trainer... I feel your pain!) ... Macho man turned to Barney Fife in 5 minutes.
(I once got a "mild" ride with a doctor who owned a Polish fighter trainer... I feel your pain!) ... Macho man turned to Barney Fife in 5 minutes.
